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The Baby Child Website A Website For The Important Little People In Our Lives |
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A Parent's Guide To Medicine Safety Home Schooling Your Child Guide
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GIVING REWARDS Some people don’t agree with rewards when it comes to children. They feel like they shouldn’t be given a treat for performing a task that they should be performing anyway. However, it has been proven that using some type of a reward system will help reinforce behavior and bring about desired results. Rewards don’t have to be anything huge and amazing. Remember, you’re dealing with a little person here who thinks it great fun to spin around and around to get that dizzy feeling – they’re easily impressed – especially if you are with them. Parents who’ve been through potty training successfully report using all sorts of different methods that work. Your reward system will have to fit your child’s personality and contain incentives that will be important to them. We mentioned before placing a potty chart on your refrigerator or in your bathroom. When your child successfully goes on the potty, let them place a sticker on the chart. If they reach a certain amount of stickers, give them a small prize or a special trip. Instead of a chart, make a picture of a road leading to a specific place ala the game “Candy Land”. The idea here is to make it down the road by going on the potty. When they get to their destination, a special treat is given. Involve your child in making this poster. It can be a really cute way to teach your child about staying on track while trying to reach a goal. Of course, candy is a big winner when it comes to potty rewards. We gave Conner M & M’s each time he would go and this seemed to work quite well. Other parents use Skittles, small size candy bars, gum, and suckers. It doesn’t really matter what you use as long as your child really desires it! If you are unsure about what will work as an incentive, ask your child what s/he would like as a reward. They know what they like the best and if they want it bad enough, they’ll sure work hard to get it! My son will be mortified to know I’m going to share this, but to illustrate how subjective rewards can be, I want to tell you what worked for us when potty training him. When he was small, back in the early 90’s, his idol was Pee-Wee Herman (I know, I know!) He watched “Pee Wee’s Big Adventure’ and “Pee Wee’s Big Top” over and over again until I thought I would scream if I had to hear that guy’s laugh just one more time. My mom was shopping the clearance aisle of a discount store when she spotted a talking Pee Wee Herman doll. Now this doll was a little disturbing looking, but very life-like and uttered Pee Wee’s famous catch phrases when you pulled the string on his back. My son was enamored. We let him have the doll to play with for just a day before we put him up on a shelf in the bathroom. We told him that when he went potty like a big boy, he could play with Pee Wee for a half hour. That was all he needed. Two days later, he was fully trained. So Pee Wee taught him to “pee pee”. Sorry, I just couldn’t resist!!! Gradually phase out the rewards as your child's visits to the bathroom become routine. If you continue to use rewards once they have mastered the task, they’ll start to expect them and may go more often than they really need to. Keep in mind that rewards don't always work. As we’ve said before, every child is different and you have to find what works with yours! Rewards are great, but the ultimate reward for a toddler can be your approval. Praising words can serve many functions for your toddler. It can boost their self-esteem, raise their confidence, and be a huge motivator for them. It can also promote an atmosphere of comfort for them. Dole out the praise as often as you can – not just during potty training. But this book IS about potty training, so here are a few things to remember when giving positive reinforcement with your words. Some people feel you shouldn’t make a HUGE deal out of using the potty, but when you’re trying to reinforce a positive behavior, it has to be up to you. We made a REALLY big deal every time Conner went on the potty. It worked for him. Give physical reinforcement in the form of hugs while you’re giving out that praise. Clap and say words like “Good for you”, “What a big boy/girl”, “You went on the potty – YAY!” and such. Don’t just congratulate your child for going on the potty; praise them when they stay dry too. Check his/her pants every hour or so and let him/her know how great it is that s/he's stayed dry. Some parents have created elaborate song and dance routines to let their child know how pleased they are. Kids love to be silly, and many adults like to be silly too. Use this time to explore your own inner child when potty training is occurring. Praise for jobs well done should be second nature. It’s just too easy to see the “bad stuff” children do when in reality they’re doing a lot more “good stuff” then we give credit for. When it’s time to introduce the potty to your toddler, give it a sunny spin. Make it sound wonderful to be old enough to sit on the potty chair. Accidents are going to happen. If your child has an accident, don’t make a big deal about it and don’t get angry. If you do this, it will chip away at their morale and could start making them feel like they really can’t do the job they’re expected to do. If your child has an accident, just help them get cleaned up and forget about it. You may want to say something encouraging like, “It’s alright, and you’ll make it to the potty next time.” Praise your child even if he or she just goes and sits on the potty but doesn’t go. This will likely occur early in the process, and is a positive behavior that should be acknowledged. Another important part of potty training is teaching your child about good hygiene.
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